a few family pictures...

Uncle Bob

Lisa



Cousins looking at...something

Grandad does pictionary

Lisa and I posing like goons

Dan shows us hows it's done

Dont we all look THRILLED to be there?

My gorgeous folks

the hotties of the family (I say this only because Laura and Kelly are unlikely to ever read my blog)

Railton Explains

Grandad takes a moment to snooze...suprise suprise
Gorgeous girlies

PS

...but I have missed Tim (and timbo, as you're just about the only person who reads this, I thought I had better give you a mention, see you soon pal x

Christmas 08

..had probably been my best yet

My family are awesome and spending time with them is a joy (mostly). Sadly Dad has spent most of Christmas ill in bed with flu but the last couple of days he's been up a bit more and it's been lovely to spend a bit of time with him. Its hitting me a little how much I will miss them while Im away,so time together has been especially precious. There has been lots of laughing while we've been together and they're great.

I also got a few lovely christmas presents. I didnt really want much this year, but got a lovely watch, and some money so i've been able to get a few bits and pieces for my travels (for my travels??new clothes lol, hardly for travelling, just for me lol)



I also went to a lovely Christmas eve service at Portsmouth, and a freeeezing sunday morning service at Hedge End this morning. It is nice to do church with my family.

I may just be converted to liking Christmas...

My weekend in Pictures

Sweaty For Jesus

My favourite video, as per the debate over lunch on Thursday

freakin' awesome, even if I do look like a man

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=2777985

LOL

Much as this is not in the spirit of my last post, it did make me laugh aLOT


(I have no clue how to embed it, dont judge)



http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=kX8A6IaLRT0

It's Christmas....apparently

Im not a big fan of Christmas, as anyone close to me knows. Mum and Dad worked every Christmas day til I was 17, and I often resented it. I rarely resented Mum and Dad devoting so much of their time to helping people, but as a kid, I resented Christmas day. I have since repented for this LOL.

However, we do have certain family traditions that make Christmas special. On Christmas eve, we always share a Cheese fondue which has become one of the most important events of the year for me. Then we all settle in for a Christmas film. This is more important to me than Christmas day, and especially as I will be away for a good chunk of next year, Im VERY excited about this years fondue.

I have not been carolling at all this year. This has been most peculiar and a little sad. It made me miss the hotch potch band at Wetherby that always had a good giggle in the market square.Even last year I managed to carol with them, but this year I havent managed a trip up north.

I have done some nice Christmas things, I went to the Winter Wonderland at Hyde Park briefly in the rain, I went to the army's big do at the Albet Hall (my thoughts on that could be a whole blog in itself, but probs too political), I went to a carol concert (well, half of it) at the Royal Festival Hall with Hannah Piper, I went to the THQ carol service, and today I went to the social services department Christmas lunch which was super.

One thing that has happened while I've been working in social services, is that, almost hourly, we get phone calls from people saying things like "I'll be sleeping on the streets this Christmas, do you have any beds?" or "I've just got no money, and my kids are asking for presents for Christmas, and I can't even afford to put food on the table" or a hundred other heartbreaking stories. It is so hard to hear, and even though we do all we can and in some situations we're really able to help, it puts something of a different slant on Christmas for me. In the current financial climate, more families than ever are dreading Christmas rather than relishing the thought, and it makes me ask more and more questions about how we celebrate and what it's really all about.

The challenge for churches is always how to put the Christmas message in a new and clever way, and some do it brilliantly...others not so much LOL. I always remember Ira Thomas putting this in a christmas letter to the Singing Company YEARS ago, and I hope I will keep this in mind this Christmas...

“The omnipotent, in one instant, made himself breakable.

He who had been spirit became pierceable.

He who was larger than the universe became an embryo.

And he who sustains the world with a word chose to be dependent upon the nourishment of a young girl.


God as a foetus.

Holiness sleeping in a womb.

The creator of life being created.


God was given eyebrows, elbows, two kidneys, and a spleen.

He stretched against the walls and floated in the amniotic fluids of his mother.


God had come near.


He came, not as a flash of light or as an unapproachable conqueror, but as one whose first cries were heard by a peasant girl and a sleepy carpenter.

The hands that first held him were unmanicured, calloused, and dirty.


No silk. No ivory. No hype. No party. No hoopla.


Were it not for the shepherds, there would have been no reception. And were it not for a group of stargazers, there would have been no gifts.”~Max Lucado

Things I dont like at the moment

• Never seeing sunlight...arriving at work in the dark, leaving work in the dark, sitting in a building with tinted windows that is so hot we have the fans on...so confusing.
• The effects of crazy heating system in THQ on my skin
• Having no decent shoes
• being cold
• people talking about Christmas all the FLIPPIN time (im so not a christmas fan)
• The animals running down the outside walls of my house all hours of the day and night
• The smell of my house
• my inability to say no to anything containing cocoa
• arguing with people I love
• my hair, its peculiar at the moment
• working somewhere where I come into contact with SO many people in genuine need and not being able to do anything to help them.
• Pasta, i have gone RIGHT off pasta...

Things I love at the moment

• Greys anatomy and Derek Shepherd (Patrick Dempsey)
• www.watchtvsitcoms.com where I can watch Greys Anatomy
• Bryn Christopher
• Sara Groves
• www.lastminute.com and my cheap nights out with Ben and Sarah as a result of their crazy theatre deals atm
• Porridge for breakfast
• comparing the temperature between London and Melbourne, watching one go down and the other go up and getting excited for 6 weeks and 4 days (eeee)
• Counting down to Melbourne (did i mention it's 6 weeks and 4 days?)
• My family (I always love them, but im taking them for granted less lately)
• My new dior foundation (ImI's influence)
• My new purple "pants to poverty" pants
• My oyster card (it took a looooong time to convince me)
• the fact that Im going to Melbourne in 6 weeks and 4 days
• bumping into Tim Stone at work, this is a nice thing, i usually get a hug out of it. Tim is lovely.

Moving On and Looking Back

Next Wednesday i finally (after a long leaving process) finish my time working at ALOVE UK. I have been there for just over 18 months and feel like such a length of time deserves mention.





During the largest chunk of my time at ALOVE, I have been the training and programme co-ordinator. Working with the team who run the Essential1 and Essential2 programmes, and I have been really priviledged to learn from some wise and experienced people in that team. I have also had some amazingly fun times at Essential training and retreats. I stood back during September training as I watched the Essentials making a giant banana split in some guttering (It was a Grinner thing...for those of you who know him, this will come as no suprise) and suddenly realised just how lucky I've been that for the last year and a half, thats been my JOB!!!





I've also had the priviledge of spending loads of time travelling round the UK visiting the various Essential1 and 2 placements, doing assessments and appraisals, and sometimes just hanging out. It is exciting to see some of the stuff that is going on at various Sally Army Centres around the country, and how passionate the people who work in our placements are about God and people.



At one of my leaving lunches (there have been 3, and then I didnt even leave, but I am going this time) I was asked to share my favourite moment, and quite franlkly it was impossible, so here are a few highlights. some serious, some...not so much



1) My relationship with Carrie...that encapsulates a whole load of favourite moments in itself. Carrie was my line manager in the training team and was a total inspiration to me. We developed a brilliant relationship whereby we could function really well together and travel together without driving each other mad (I hope). I cant really explain the friendship we have, except to say that she is something like a big sister to me, and we have had lots of laughs together. Carrie and I have similar blonde moments, so they have provided much hilarity...special moments include the 2 of us trying to build a set of drawers, which took a whole afternoon and one of the drawers wouldn't even close LOL. Also, todays moment where Carrie thought Singapore was a city in the country of TOKYO!!! lol there've been lots of laughs, and I like Carrie alot



2) Being part of the wider Alove team...They are an awesome bunch of people. Alot of them I had known of before I worked with them, through Roots and various other youthy events, so it has honestly been a huge privilege to have lunch with them and hear about their weekends and see that they're even more amazing than I thought in most cases. People like Russell Rook book up their diary months in advance yet have had time to sit and chat with me about my plans for the future and my fears and concerns and my heart about stuff. That's been pretty amazing and I've felt honoured. There have also been some really fun times as a team, including recording our own version of "do they know it's Christmas?" for our Christmas party, playing laser quest in the forest on the isle of wight, and the various stages of hysteria that Roots brings.

3) Actually roots probably deserves a mention...Being involved in Roots has probably been the hardest and most rewarding thing I've done since being at ALOVE. It really is the most intense experience, especially for the core Alove team who are working at it for months before the event. And then being there, no sleep, and doing something totally out of yoour comfort zone is hard work. But so much fun, and some of my best memories and most important friendships have happened at or because of roots.

4)The Essentials. Last but not least. These guys (E1's and E2's from all the years i've been involved) have been amazing and I feel honoured to have been part of the training. I have had some awesome fun with them, but also have been able to be part of their spiritual development and see them grow and develop. So the memory I eventually picked as my favourite was this one...at the E1 debrief this year (July) one of the mornings we shared "holy space" together. It was the morning that the announcement was made about the new director of Alove, and the whole team were with the Essentials for prayers which was awesome. During that time, we were asked to write an "I have a dream..." speech, to share our dreams for the future. The things shared both by the Essentials and the Alove team were so special, and I genuinely felt I was standing on holy ground as Jesus came very close to share his dreams for the futures of those people.

So as I leave, and Im terrified. My prayer is that those dreams shared that day will become a reailty in those lives

"All Change Please"

So, lots more changes in the life of Rebecca. This is both good and exciting, but is also scary and frustrating.

So due to some financial stuff and some decisions made by me, Uni is not happening this year as planned. Instead, on January 27th I am moving to Australia...yep...crazy and rash as that may seem, yesterday I got my visa and today I booked flights so Im going. Not totally alone as I have a couple of friends in Melbourne (which is where Im going) and a friend that I plan to stay with. However, Im going on an adventure that is just mine and Im gonna be away from all the people I love and sometimes rely on, and I am soooooo excited, and scared LOL.

This Saturday, my good friend Meghan is getting married to my even better friend (!!long standing joke!!) Michael Owen. Megs doesn't cope well with change and by the time she returns not only will I have left (the most traumatic change), but also, Russ, her boss and our director at Alove will have gone on to his new adventure, and she will be Mrs Meghan Owen and will be living with Mr Michael Owen (Who I believe is keeping his name)...all of this change has been alot for poor Megs to cope with and she's been struggling not to be extremely freaked out by it (let it be here noted that she loves Mike very much and is very excited about being his wife...theres just alot of stuff happening at the same time).

So Megs and I have had a fair old few chats about change. I like change more than she does...in fact I have an opposite problem to her...I like change too much and struggle more with things staying the same for too long...that makes me get antsy (or ancy if you're Carrie) and do silly/rash things just to spice things up a little. I suspect neither Meghan or I have the balance quite right to be honest, but I do wish I was a little more stable at times.

However, then Dave shared some thoughts with us in Alove prayers last week about how God wants to see change happen in the world, and how if we're christians we have to want that too. We have to want to see Gods kingdom come, and that means massive change! Dave challenged us to think about what Gods kingdom coming to earth would look like...its a pretty exciting picture.

But that brings me to my next current challenge. ON holiday a few weeks ago, I read Shane Claibournes "Irresistible revolution" for the second, and in some ways the first time. It challenged me more than I could possibly record here, and gave me a tiny glimpse of what Gods Kingdom could look like. Shane has seen Gods heart, Im sure of that, and so he loves people in a way I've never seen in anyone (and I've seen some pretty awesome, loving christians) and he sees how Christians should be bringing about change.

Today is Blog action day, and the theme is Poverty (see www.magicmusings.com for a much better blog than mine). Shane Claibournes challenge is that as Christians we should be eradicating poverty. Not just with campaigns and food parcels, but with life altering generosity and total commitment to the poor. In Shane's words "True generosity is measured not by how much we give away but by how much we have left". He also says "The early christians said that if a child starves while a christian has extra food then the christian is guilty of murder"

Challenging words...especially for someone who just spent the best part of a grand on a plane ticket to Aus. But I am sure that I want to see change, but not just change for change's sake, and not even just change that makes me feel better. I want to see the kind of change that Jesus brings, and I want to find a way to be a part of that

Don't think I could find better words than this...

It's been a hard year.
But I'm climbing out of the rubble.
These lessons are hard.
Healing changes are subtle.
But every day it's...
Less like tearing more like building.
Less like captive more like willing.
Less like breakdown more like surrender.
Less like haunting more like remember.


And I feel you here.
And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars and more like character.

Less like a prison more like my room.
Less like a casket more like a womb.
Less like dying more like transcending.
Less like fear, less like an ending...

And I feel you here.
And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars.

Just a little while ago.
I couldn't feel the power or the hope.
I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing.
Just a little while back.
I was desperate, broken, laid out.
Hoping you would come.
And I need you.
And I want you here.
And I feel you...And I feel you here.

And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt.
look less like scars.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars
And more like character...

so...

SO it's been like a year since I actually blogged, and I would really like to start again, so Im gonna give it a go and see how I get along with it.

At present, it's August at ALOVE (...and everywhere else I would imagine) which means lots of time in the office which is something of a mixed blessing. I definitely prefer the time of year when Im out and about visiting the Essential placements or doing event stuff, but especially as Im leaving in 6 weeks, time in the office is useful and necessary for getting up to date with stuff.

Im also fairly homeless at the moment, and so staying a few weeks at a time at various peoples houses. Since moving out of good ol' WBC a few weeks ago, I've been living with the officers at Bromley (Gwen and Andy) who have been so very kind to me and have really put themselves out sometimes to make me comfortable. However, for the next two weeks Im staying at Carrie and Ad's house while they're in Canada and this has made me realise how much I need my space. I've always known that Im an extrovert and I love being around people. In fact, I really NEED people around me to make me feel valued and thus able to function. However, Im discovering a new side to myself, a side that needs, just sometimes, to dissappear for a little while and have some "me" time. I think I did it without thinking while living at the college, but it's only in the last month that I've realised how much I need it. At first I was kinda concerned by it, because actually, until not that long ago, I hated being on my own. However, I suspect that actually Im just liking myself a bit more and beginning to feel a bit more comfortable in my own skin, and therefore able to enjoy my own company...and I think that's a good thing. Plus, It's this alone time that I use to "hang out" with God and therefore I've been missing that too, and hope to have some more of it this week.

And finally, wedding season is well and truly upon me.

2 weeks ago I went to the wedding of Karen and Shaun. Shaun is one of my oldest friends and my adopted big brother, and I had the priviledge of living with Karen last year and getting to know her as the awesome woman of God she is. The wedding was beautiful, and the ceremony was truly inspiring as there was no doubt that they were totally commited to having God at the centre of their marriage. I love you guys

and then this weekend I went to John and Jo's wedding. John is the events manager at ALOVE, but it was a very different kind of wedding for me as I'd never met the bride and I didn't really know anyone at the wedding. Oh, and a pregnant lady was there wearing the same dress as me. lol, but it was still a lovely day, and in many ways for John it was a miracle for which I, and many others, thank God.

Words of challenge

God of the moon and stars
God of the gay- and singles bars
God of the fragile hearts we are, I come to you

God of our history,
God of the future that will be
What will you make of me, I come to you

God of the meek and mild,
God of the reckless and the wild
God of the unreconciled, I come to you

God of our life and death
God of our secrets unconfessed
God of our every breath, I come to you

God of the rich and poor
God of the princess and the whore
God of the ever open door, I come to you

God of the unborn child
God of the pure and undefiled
God of the pimp and paedophile, I come to you

God of the war and peace
God of the junkie and the priest
God of the greatest and the least, I come to you
God of the refugee
God of the prisoner and the free
God of our doubt and certainty, I come to you

God of our joy and grief
God of the lawyer and the thief
God of our faith and unbelief, I come to you

God of the wounds we bear
God of the deepest dreams we share
God of our unspoken prayer, I come to you

God of a world that's lost
God of the lonely cross
God who has come to us, I come to you

I'm so bad at this blogging malarchy these days. Facebook has taken over my life and I am its humble servant (slave!)

So much has happened that I couldn't possibly update it all.
However, I have just, once again, got back from YSCA which has been an awesome experience. With the theme "step up to the microphone" I have been massively challenged both to speak up and to act about a whole load of big issues from the environment to injustice. It was an amazing week and I was honoured to spend it with some incredible people. Special note goes to the "awesome foursome" with added honorary member Lauren and especiall to Emmarrrr who was the highlight of the week. Jill also deserves special mention purely for being so brave

love love love

June!

Not doing so great with the blogging these days...I seem to spend too much of my life on facebook...anyway

The last few weeks have continued to be mental, and now that I sit down to write something, Im struggling to remember what I've been doing, but lots has happened so I shall get my diary out and see what I've been doing

ah yes, I remember

I went to Leeds for a weekend which was BRILLIANT. I had the best time. Arriving at Leeds station was a weird experience and made me cry which I didnt expect. A whole heap of different emotions came up and I didnt quite know what to do with them. However, before I had too long to dwell on that, I was in a taxi on my way to Wetherby where I spent some time hanging out with Beth and Adam who are just GRRREAT! I got time to go to my old church and see some people there and share with some of the people there how great God has been to me in the last few months. Then i headed to Chris' house...wait no, then I had coffee with Pete which was wicked because he always talks to me on a pretty deep level and make me really think about stuff which I need!!THEN i went to Chris' house (Chris is my best friends boyfriend) and me, him, Jill and Jenf hung out and played on the wii and just enjoyed being together...it doesnt happen often enough these days. Then monday was coffee with miss Emilie Smith and then back to London. It was such a nice weekend, and was alot of fun. However, more importantly I think it helped me kill some of my ghosts. When I left Leeds it was really under a cloud, and going back in more positive circumstances was so good for me. It also made me miss Jenny and Jill even more than usual...thats hard.

Last weekend, I sang at the Albert Hall...wow that sounds more impressive than it was really. Basically I was part of a massed youth choir of 500 young people singing at a big Salvation Army do. It was LOTS more fun than I expected and I got to hang out with some of my favourite people again.Electralyte were just...wow...awesomeness...God really spoke to me as they sang! I also saw Callum, with whom I am going to see Bon Jovi in 8DAYS!!!!!!!!!

Also I have a new boyfriend...that is all I have to say on that subject

IM BACK!

So after a little time away to recontemplate my blog, Im back! A few things have changed/happened since my last blog, but as it's all gone anyway I doubt that matters too much.

One interesting thing is that, 2 years after starting blogging, I now actually work for 'Alove' which brings the whole name of my blog into a slightly different focus.

However, the main reason for writing today is because last weekend was ROOTS (which apparently has to be all in capital letters!) and I had an AWESOME (Also in capitals) time! This year I was producing the Parklife venue-as part of my role with Alove-which made the whole weekend experience pretty different. For a start I was in Southport for nearly a week and involved in some of the set-up and pack-down for the weekend. This was actually more fun than I expected, except for Thursday morning when I sprained my wrist and my boss quite seriously hurt her back lifting stuff so we ended up unable to do much!

Another difference to the weekend was that I just didnt see anybody!If they didnt come into Parklife I just didnt get to see them, and even some of my best friends who were around I didnt have time to spend with. I also had some personal rubbish going on during the weekend, and in many ways it was a really hard few days.

However, it was also an awesome experience, I learned lots, saw God do some wicked stuff and had some good laughs along the way. I think a big part of it for me was the fact that I saw the progression over the weekend of the guys in Parklife. Rather than picking and choosing which venue to go to as I usually do, I actually had an investment in the young adults programme and saw the things God was doing there during the weekend. Highlights included

1) hearing the guys in Parklife shouting 'Freedom' during the human trafficking appeal, and hearing stories of people who were crying because they were so angry at the injustice of the human trafficking industry. In many ways this meant more to me than the £800 the venue raised for the appeal because it shows a real development of a heart for justice and a desire to make a difference which goes beyond one monetary appeal.

2) singing 'Lord you are good' on Monday morning and looking around seeing my brother and my cousin engaged in the worship and realising the truth of the words that God has been good to our family 'from generation to generation'...that was totally not part of what was going on at that point but I was really struck by it.

3)YaYA exec lunches...it was so great for me to be allowed to be part of a team with such fantastic Christian guys and to see how they dealt with the various things that happened during the weekend with grace but also with integrity, Matt, Grinner, Phil, Carrie, Sandjea and Steve...it was a priviledge

4)Sunday nights outdoor response

5) Parklife venue meetings-the randomness of Matt Leeder and Glyn when put together is just immense...as was Glyn's ability to wind up our venue production manager

6)Grinners preaching injury!

7)Carrie and Glyn hosting, including Carrie's attempts to read the football scores "Is Aston Villa in England?!"

8) Realising who some of my best friends are, especially Ben K who was there when I needed someone the most...you earned your chocolates!

There are so many other highlights, but I cant remember them right now. Suffice to say it was an incredible weekend, and I'm excited to hear some other peoples experiences, and more importantly to hear what Gods gonna do with those experiences in the coming months/years.