Don't think I could find better words than this...

It's been a hard year.
But I'm climbing out of the rubble.
These lessons are hard.
Healing changes are subtle.
But every day it's...
Less like tearing more like building.
Less like captive more like willing.
Less like breakdown more like surrender.
Less like haunting more like remember.


And I feel you here.
And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars and more like character.

Less like a prison more like my room.
Less like a casket more like a womb.
Less like dying more like transcending.
Less like fear, less like an ending...

And I feel you here.
And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars.

Just a little while ago.
I couldn't feel the power or the hope.
I couldn't cope, I couldn't feel a thing.
Just a little while back.
I was desperate, broken, laid out.
Hoping you would come.
And I need you.
And I want you here.
And I feel you...And I feel you here.

And you're picking up the pieces.
Forever faithful.
It seemed out of my hands a bad situation.
But you are able.
And in your hands the pain and hurt.
look less like scars.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars.
And in your hands the pain and hurt
look less like scars
And more like character...

so...

SO it's been like a year since I actually blogged, and I would really like to start again, so Im gonna give it a go and see how I get along with it.

At present, it's August at ALOVE (...and everywhere else I would imagine) which means lots of time in the office which is something of a mixed blessing. I definitely prefer the time of year when Im out and about visiting the Essential placements or doing event stuff, but especially as Im leaving in 6 weeks, time in the office is useful and necessary for getting up to date with stuff.

Im also fairly homeless at the moment, and so staying a few weeks at a time at various peoples houses. Since moving out of good ol' WBC a few weeks ago, I've been living with the officers at Bromley (Gwen and Andy) who have been so very kind to me and have really put themselves out sometimes to make me comfortable. However, for the next two weeks Im staying at Carrie and Ad's house while they're in Canada and this has made me realise how much I need my space. I've always known that Im an extrovert and I love being around people. In fact, I really NEED people around me to make me feel valued and thus able to function. However, Im discovering a new side to myself, a side that needs, just sometimes, to dissappear for a little while and have some "me" time. I think I did it without thinking while living at the college, but it's only in the last month that I've realised how much I need it. At first I was kinda concerned by it, because actually, until not that long ago, I hated being on my own. However, I suspect that actually Im just liking myself a bit more and beginning to feel a bit more comfortable in my own skin, and therefore able to enjoy my own company...and I think that's a good thing. Plus, It's this alone time that I use to "hang out" with God and therefore I've been missing that too, and hope to have some more of it this week.

And finally, wedding season is well and truly upon me.

2 weeks ago I went to the wedding of Karen and Shaun. Shaun is one of my oldest friends and my adopted big brother, and I had the priviledge of living with Karen last year and getting to know her as the awesome woman of God she is. The wedding was beautiful, and the ceremony was truly inspiring as there was no doubt that they were totally commited to having God at the centre of their marriage. I love you guys

and then this weekend I went to John and Jo's wedding. John is the events manager at ALOVE, but it was a very different kind of wedding for me as I'd never met the bride and I didn't really know anyone at the wedding. Oh, and a pregnant lady was there wearing the same dress as me. lol, but it was still a lovely day, and in many ways for John it was a miracle for which I, and many others, thank God.

Words of challenge

God of the moon and stars
God of the gay- and singles bars
God of the fragile hearts we are, I come to you

God of our history,
God of the future that will be
What will you make of me, I come to you

God of the meek and mild,
God of the reckless and the wild
God of the unreconciled, I come to you

God of our life and death
God of our secrets unconfessed
God of our every breath, I come to you

God of the rich and poor
God of the princess and the whore
God of the ever open door, I come to you

God of the unborn child
God of the pure and undefiled
God of the pimp and paedophile, I come to you

God of the war and peace
God of the junkie and the priest
God of the greatest and the least, I come to you
God of the refugee
God of the prisoner and the free
God of our doubt and certainty, I come to you

God of our joy and grief
God of the lawyer and the thief
God of our faith and unbelief, I come to you

God of the wounds we bear
God of the deepest dreams we share
God of our unspoken prayer, I come to you

God of a world that's lost
God of the lonely cross
God who has come to us, I come to you